La Coiffe/Lore

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Official Profile

Age 23 Height 157 cm Race Erune
Hobbies Trying out cuisine made with natural ingredients
Likes People and designs that try to be cute
Dislikes People and designs that don't care about being cute

Character Release
オーガニックスタイラーを名乗るエルーン族の庭師。 オーガニックスタイラーとは、巨大なハサミを使って、毒樹や毒草を綺麗にカッティングして、解毒して、人間と敵対しない関係を再構築することを旨としている。決して毒のある草木を駆逐するのが目的ではない。


Character Release

Source [1] [2] [3]
* This is an unofficial, amateur translation.

Age 23歳 Height 157cm Race エルーン
Hobbies 自然素材を使った料理の旨味探訪
Likes カワイイを努力した人やデザイン
Dislikes カワイイをサボってる人やデザイン

Character Release
オーガニックスタイラーを名乗るエルーン族の庭師。 オーガニックスタイラーとは、巨大なハサミを使って、毒樹や毒草を綺麗にカッティングして、解毒して、人間と敵対しない関係を再構築することを旨としている。決して毒のある草木を駆逐するのが目的ではない。


Character Release

Source [1] [2] [3]




Special Cutscenes

Stamp118.png Spoiler Alert!
These tabs contain special event cutscene scripts.
View these tabs at your own discretion.

Happy Birthday Cutscenes
# Link Text

Happy birthday, (Captain)!
Hee hee, c'mon, don't! Quit it!
When I see you, (Captain), I start feeling embarrassed for some reason.
You've been smiling so much, it's just kind of infectious, hee hee.
When I see that smiling face of yours, I just want to shower you with presents!
Hip hip hooray, (Captain)!


You can't hide it from me! I can see it on your face!
After all, (Captain), you're grinning from ear to ear!
Hehe. That's right—happy birthday!
Aww, the smile on your face makes me smile too.
Hehe. Well, this calls for one thing...
Let's make that smile even bigger!
Clippy-clippy clip clip. Clippy-clippy clip clip. Clippy-cliiiiiippy clip clip. Clippy-clippy clip clip.
What am I doing you ask?
I'm performing Happy Birthday using my scissors.
What else would I play it on? I can't play the piano or organ, you know.


Hee heee! Happy biiirthday, (Captain).
Ehehe. I just can't stop smiling. I wonder why? Why could that be?
It's 'cause of the smile on your face, (Captain)!
Look! Look at all the smiles on your crewmates' faces!
You're the crew's bluebird of happiness, (Captain). Tweet, tweet!
Ehehe. I'll be ready to make your next birthday a happy one too, (Captain).


Applause! Applause for (Captain)'s birthday!
This bouquet is my present to you!
I bet you've never seen flowers like these before, huh. They're actually poisonous ones.
Don't get the wrong idea though. You just have to trim them right, and they give off this really relaxing substance.
You've been looking really bushed lately. It's gotten me worried, you know?
You should at least take care of yourself on your birthday. Okay?
Oh, sorry if it seems like I'm talking down to you like a child. Didn't mean it that way!


(Captain), happy birthday!
It's great seeing you so happy lately!
Seeing you in such a chipper mood puts a smile on my face!
And I'm definitely not alone in that department!
You're the flower that brings calm to our hearts...
I'll keep taking care of you so that you can continue blooming for all our sakes!
For starters, I brought you birthday cake and some organic veggies to go with it! Let's celebrate!

Happy New Year Cutscenes
# Link Text

Happy New Year!
Hee hee, a whole new year starts from this day forward!
I hear there are gardeners on other islands who are still busy even during days like today. It wasn't like that where I grew up, though.
Like, people use pine needles and bamboo to make decorations, apparently.
Hee hee, I wonder what that's like? I really want to try my hand at it myself, sometime!


A shiny, spanking new year is upon us, (Captain)!
Hehe... I just looove this feeling.
You know, when it's kinda cold out, but brisk and refreshing!
I've decided that this year I'm gonna try and act more like a big sister!
A dignified lady, inspiring awe across the sky!
Heh. Nah, I'm just kidding... I don't think I'm ready to act as anyone's big sister just yet.
But you know, I think it'd be really cool...
Hehe... Say, (Captain). Maybe just this once, could you call me your... big sister?
W-wait, wait! I-I was only joking!
Hehehe... Oh, (Captain)... You really are just adorable!


(Captain), happy New Year!
Are you hungry? How about enjoying some osechi with me?
Ehehe... I made it just for you.
Isn't it beautiful? Here's a bamboo leaf, and pine, and aspidistra...
Oh, did you think I was talking about food?
No way. All I prepared were some decorative leafs.
I know it's very simple, but they make food look even more appealing.
Now that I say that... Even these leafs are starting to look tasty!
Ehehe... I'll feed them to you one by one!
Say, "ah!"


Today's the start of an exciting new year, (Captain)!
Ehehe, a bunch of us are preparing a New Year's feast. I'm in charge of vegetables.
I'll be sure to use organic only so that everything's super healthy!
I hope you'll have some and see how refreshing my veggies can be, (Captain).


Good morning! You're up pretty early.
Going for your first shrine visit of the year? What a good captain you are! Us crew members are lucky to have you praying for our good health!
Oh, me? I was getting the organic vegetables ready for our New Year's meal.
But I suppose I've done enough for now. Mind if I tag along for the shrine visit?
Awesome! Let me make some hot vegetable soup before we head out then!
It wouldn't do for you to catch a cold before you can pray for everyone's health, right?

Valentine's Day Cutscenes
# Link Text

Happy Valentine's, Captain!
Hee hee... I guess I'm a little embarrassed.
Anyway, Captain. Thanks for everything.
If it's okay with you, um... Would you try these chocolates I got you? Please?
Gosh, would you listen to me?
Why am I so embarrassed about this?
Hee hee, so it goes, I suppose.


Happy lovey-dovey Valentine's Day, (Captain).
Hm? What is it? Come on, tell me, (Captain)!
My fragrance is really strong? Sniff, sniff...
W-wait! Don't start sniffing me like that, (Captain)!
But is it really that obvious? Is... is it a sweet fragrance?
Oh, goodness... Here I was, trying to keep it a secret to surprise you.
Here it is—my Valentine's Day present to you!
I collected nectar from all kinds of flowers to make it, so be sure to really savor the flavor!


Hello! Happy Valentine's Day, (Captain).
Here's your chocolate.
All the ingredients are 100% organic!
So no matter how much you eat, you won't get fat. Great for the body!
Take a bite of my love!
Oh... That was a little embarrassing to say... Ehehe...


Happy Valentine's! Hope you're ready to get all mushy, (Captain)!
Because I've got a lovely batch of chocolates just for you!
Ehehe, I made sure to focus on the taste and the shapes this year.
From little birdies to flowers. Don't they look adorable?
I snuck in a few heart-shaped ones too.
Let's see if you're able to pick out my feelings of love. Teehee...


Happy Valentine's Day! I've got chocolates packed with love for you again this year!
I tried adding in some fruit this time around. They came out with a nice, bittersweet flavor, so I'm pretty happy with the result!
As you can probably guess, they're chock-full of organic fruit, so they're healthier than your average chocolates!
I hope they'll help keep you happy and healthy for a looong time to come.
Plus... I hope I can stay with you for a long time too. Ehehe.
Saying it face-to-face like this is, er... a little embarrassing...
A-anyway, I hope eating these chocolates will perk you right up, (Captain).

White Chocolate Cake square.jpg White Chocolate Cake
4th year: Assorted Chocolates square.jpg Assorted Chocolates

White Day Cutscenes
# Link Text

Hee hee... Happy White Day, (Captain)!
Huh? Whuzzah? Oh no, is this not happening?
But I was expecting something, at the very least...
You're so faithful and kind, Captain, so I bet you got me something, right?
Just let me know when you're ready to hand the chocolates over, okay?


Um... (Captain)?
Er... I know it's... White Day... but...
Uh, just forget it! Never mind!
Oh goodness gracious, what am I even saying... Hehehe.
But you know, there's still a little room left in my tummy...
Especially for looots of tasty sweets!
Hehehe, just kidding.


Happy White Day, (Captain)!
Sniff... Oh, you smell nice today, (Captain).
Hm? Is that an organic perfume? For me?
Wow! Thank you, (Captain)!
Ehehe... I just sprayed some on! What do you think?
Hey! Don't sniff me so much!


(Captain), do you know what today is?
Hint: Something's new about me. Care to guess what that might be?
Whoa, would you stop sniffing all over me? You're a bit too close for comfort.
Ehehe, have you noticed though? I put on the perfume you gave me last year.
I've decided this'll be my White Day perfume from now on.
You know how they say scents stick in your memory longer? Well, I'm hoping that you'll remember my scent for years to come.
Oh, I can't believe I just said that... Ehehe...


Whoa, (Captain)? What a surprise running into you here.
Oh, did you notice? Since it's White Day, I'm wearing that perfume you gave me again.
Hehe. But you can't smell it unless you're right next to me, right? I've been trying to hold back recently, you see.
I'll end up running out if I'm not careful, so I've been using it sparingly.
And besides, if I only spray a small amount, no one will be able to smell it unless they get really close.
Meaning no one but you will pick up the scent. Ehehe...
Oh—your gift this year is perfume again!
Aw, so you were paying attention to how much I had left. Thanks!
I'll make sure to use it even more carefully from here on out.

Trick or Treat Cutscenes
# Link Text

Trick or treat! Or something like that!
Oh, come on, Captain! Quit shaking!
Hee hee, sorry! Just a little joke in the spirit of Halloween!
Aw, don't be like that! Why are you running?
I'm pretty ticked off now, Captain. Instead of trick or treat... you're getting a clipper treat. Snip snip... Snip snip...


Come on now, (Captain)! Let's say it together—trick or treat!
Aren't you excited?
Not really? What? Today is going to be a wonderful day though!
You've left me with no other choice. I'll just have to make you excited.
Are you ready to get teased? Hehe.
After all, bad children get clip-clip-clipped!
Here comes Mr. Scissors!
Ah, sorry! I was just kidding! Don't be scared!
Look, (Captain), Mr. Scissors has gone home.
I didn't mean to scare you.
How about we go clip up some delicious fruit?


Trick or treeeaaat! Are you psyched, (Captain)?
Clippity-clip, clip! Mr. Scissors is back for another Halloween!
Now where are all those bad kids playing pranks on people? Is there one heeere?
Aww, sorry. Did I scare you?
Will some sweets sweeten your mood? Here. Am I off the hook?
Hehehe, I'm getting all excited now too. Why in the skies do you think that would be, (Captain)?


Happy Halloween, (Captain)!
Snip, snip, snip! Mr. Scissors is going to see a lot of action today!
Aw, no need to be so shy, (Captain). Mr. Scissors doesn't bite!
I'm making a jack-o-lantern modeled after your face.
But I'm having a little trouble with the details. (Captain), can I take a really good look at your face up close?
Haha, I always thought your face was a joy to look at, (Captain).
Oh, I'm starting to blush from looking into your eyes for so long... Ehehehe...


Clippity-clip! This is what Halloween's all about!
Oh, sorry! I hope I didn't scare you with Mr. Scissors.
But you should know they're super popular among the children in town.
If I sing along while snipping away, the children come to watch!
Here, this extra pair of scissor's just for you, (Captain)!
We can go snippity-snip together this year, (Captain).
Two pairs of Mr. Scissors trimming away—that's double the action and double the fun! The children are sure to have a good time!
C'mon, (Captain)! Let's do it while holding hands!

Happy Holidays Cutscenes
# Link Text

It's the most wonderful time of the year at last!
Hee hee, you know it, don't you? That's right. I love the holiday spirit.
But then, this is the busiest time of year for gardeners like us.
It's usually super busy! We have to make sure all the plants are looking extra festive in town and across the whole island!
But this year, I only have the one tree aboard the ship to worry about.
Funny, though. I don't feel the slightest bit sad about that.
Hee hee, I wonder why that is? You have any idea, Captain?


Tis the season, (Captain)!
Now this isn't something you see everyday.
What's gotcha lookin' so excited, (Captain)?
Oh, dear... Could it be that you're excited for a certain man in red to come?
Aww, (Captain)... You're so adorable sometimes!
You've never stopped believing in him, have you?
Surely it's because you've had the gift of friends to celebrate and fill your heart with joy every year.
That's my favorite part about you, (Captain).
Hehe, oh dear... Now you've... hehe... got me all excited too!


How exciting! It's that time of the year of the again, (Captain)!
Look, look! I made a beautiful holiday wreath!
And this is a present for you. Put it around your neck.
Wow! How cute! You're all sparkly just like a holiday tree.
Ehehe... Looking at you just makes this day even better!
Even my heart shines like a star! Just kidding... Hehehe...


Happy holidays! You excited about the festivities, (Captain)?
I'm snipping some tree branches right now to use as hands for snow pals!
It's a special request from some of the kids in the crew. I guess they're really counting on me.
Ehehe, just imagining their faces light up gets me all hyped.
Here's an extra happy smile for you, (Captain)!
Just my way of spreading the joy. May you have a merry winter season, (Captain). Teehee...


Happy holidays! Are you having a happy, happy time?
I know I am! I had the chance to style up all the snowmen around this year!
Plus the garden too!
Now the snowmen are having a party in the garden!
Hehe, the holiday tree there got a cute makeover too!
How about it? Want to hop into the winter wonderland and join the fun?
You might just get a taste of a special holiday dinner if you do!

Fate Episodes

Stamp56.png Spoiler Alert!
These tabs contain full Fate Episode cutscene scripts with major spoilers about the character. View these tabs at your own discretion.

She Who Styles the Forest

(Captain) and the crew attempt to make a delivery to a mountain village, but find their way blocked by massive, poisonous thorns. A woodcutter introduces them to La Coiffe, the wondrous stylist of the forest, who uses her unique gardening techniques to cut, style, and trim a path through the thorns. She then joins the crew to spread her special gardening style to the rest of the world.

(Captain) and company are requested to transport a package to a nearby village.
Unfortunately, the road to their destination is blocked off by an enormous overgrowth of thorns.
Vyrn: Look at all these spikes! (Captain), clear the way for us, will ya?
(Captain) stands in front of the thorns and crouches for stability.
With sword raised, (Captain) gets ready to—
Woodcutter: Stop, please! Don't cut those thorns!
Vyrn: Wait, why not? What's the big deal, chief?
Woodcutter: Those thorns contain a deadly toxin. If you aren't trained to handle them, you'll be showered in poison!
Woodcutter: Even woodcutters like myself rarely attempt to cut them down.
Lyria: Wow, that was a close call, then! Thanks for warning us, Mr. Woodcutter!
Vyrn: So what should we do? We've gotta get this package to the village, but those thorns are in the way!
Lyria: That's right. What can we do?
Woodcutter: Your best bet is to head back down the mountain and take the path around. No poison down there.
Vyrn: But we've gotta get this to the village by the end of the day!
Woodcutter: Hm, in that case, how about stopping by my village? The forest stylist should be able to do something about it.
Vyrn: Forest stylist? What's a barber gonna do about a gaggle of poisonous plants?
The crew heads to a nearby village and visits the house the woodcutter mentioned.
A sign denotes the house as a local landscaper's residence.
Vyrn: That woodcutter said we were visiting a barber, but this is a landscaper's house!
Papa Landscaper: Hm? Anything I can help you folks with?
Lyria: Well, actually...
Lyria explains the situation to the landscapers, and requests them to clear away the poison thorns.
With pained, apologetic expressions, the husband and wife duo are forced to decline.
Mama Landscaper: Oh, this is most unfortunate. We'd like to accept. Really, we would.
Papa Landscaper: But we have to head into town at the base of the mountain to prune the plants there, you see.
Lyria: Aw, that really is unfortunate.
???: I'll handle it!
Mama Landscaper: Ah, now that you mention it, that could work.
A young Erune suddenly enters, calling herself La Coiffe.
She explains that she's currently training under the landscapers in order to learn their gardening techniques.
Papa Landscaper: Will you be able to handle it alone, La Coiffe?
La Coiffe: We're talking about the thorns up by the mountain pass, right? Not a problem! I've trimmed those up before, y'know!
Lyria: Trimmed?
Vyrn: So uh, is this scissor girl really going to be able to do anything about the thorns?
Ignoring Vyrn's concerns, La Coiffe readies her massive scissors, a serious expression on her face.
La Coiffe: Time to take a little bit off the top! How about changing your colors up to be more organic? Something closer to what you used to look like?
Vyrn: Whoa, is she about to do something?
La Coiffe: No way, you did this yourself? Playing with fire, my friend!
La Coiffe: And would you look at this? Your roots look simply devastated!
La Coiffe: Hm, the color's started to thin, too. How about a touch-up?
Lyria: Wow, look at that! The thorns looked so sickly before, but now their colors are as vibrant and beautiful as a flower garden!
La Coiffe: You're in good hands now! We'll have your original colors back quick as can be!
La Coiffe: Let's add some gradients, too! And if I do this, we'll really be able to draw out some volume!
La Coiffe: Change the length, change your look! Let's give you a layered bob style to add dimension!
Vyrn: I have no idea what's going on anymore! She keeps cutting and cutting, but no poison's coming out!
La Coiffe: Hmm, still looking a little too heavy, don't you think? Time to do a little tweaking!
La Coiffe: Ooh, let's take your tips and really thin things out!
La Coiffe: And look at this fluffy stuff here! They're like the seeds from a dandelion or something! One flick, and the sky is filled with the smell of spring!
La Coiffe: Holy smokes, you need water, honey! Have you been properly moisturizing lately? A beautiful girl like you needs her H2O!
La Coiffe: Hee hee, let's just mist here, and over here, take a little bit off the top here, and—
With a flurry of scissor swipes, La Coiffe quickly thins out the poisonous thorns, creating a small tunnel to the other side.
Thanks to La Coiffe's assistance, the party reaches their destination unpoisoned, and delivers the package on time, to boot.
A job well done, (Captain) and company return to La Coiffe's home, smiling all the while.
Vyrn: That was a close shave back there! I didn't realize when the woodcutter called you a stylist that you literally cut the forest's hair!
Lyria: Why did you leave some of the thorns behind, though?
La Coiffe: I'm an organic stylist. Nature's precious to me, so I only trim where necessary.
Vyrn: But if you leave it the way it is now, people are gonna get poisoned!
La Coiffe: Actually, you might not have heard, but those thorns weren't even poisonous up until about 10 years ago.
Vyrn: The heck?
La Coiffe: The poison's a natural defense mechanism against people cutting, picking, and generally doing whatever they want to the thorns whenever it suits them.
La Coiffe: That's why my family's been hard at work developing new gardening techniques to allow us to coexist more peacefully with nature.
Lyria: Is that what you meant by that organic stuff earlier?
La Coiffe: That's right. I'm an organic stylist!
Lyria: Wow, you're the most amazing gardener I've ever seen!
La Coiffe: Got that right! But my family's never going to make any waves working out here in the middle of nowhere.
La Coiffe: I know! I'll tag along with you guys! That's okay with you, right, Captain?
  1. Of course. Welcome aboard!
  2. Can you handle Vyrn's hair?

Choose: Of course. Welcome aboard!
La Coiffe: Whoa, you're sure? I was just joking, but if it's okay with you, let's go!
Vyrn: Psh, give me a break...
La Coiffe: I've been thinking about it since we were back at the village. You bring smiles wherever you go! Just the kind of people I want to be with!
Vyrn: Hoo boy. Well, you've got spirit, that's for sure!
And with that, La Coiffe, the wondrous organic stylist, joins the crew.

Choose: Can you handle Vyrn's hair?
La Coiffe: Hmm, I wonder. Maybe do him up with something vivid and neon?
Vyrn: More like vyvyd! Not that I really know much about all that hair lingo you were throwing around!
La Coiffe: Looks like that fine head of hair's never even been touched. Perfect candidate for something heavy in front, with nothing in back.
La Coiffe: Ooh, or maybe just go high and tight?
Vyrn: High and tight? That sounds right up this high-flying dragon's alley!
La Coiffe: It's basically a clean shave of your entire head!
Vyrn: Wait a sec, bald? That's going a little overboard, don't you think?
La Coiffe: Hee hee, sorry about that. On second thought, my scissors are only really cut out for plants.
La Coiffe: I mean, I couldn't really tell you where the different parts of your hairline are. The parietal ridge? No idea!
La Coiffe: Ah, sorry. There I go with the lingo again. The parietal ridge is like, the line between the top of your head and... the side of your head?
Vyrn: Got me stumped. Do plants even have that stuff in the first place?
And with that, La Coiffe, the wondrous organic stylist, joins the crew.
Continue 1

Simply Organic

While shopping for supplies, the crew finds a restaurant famous for its all-natural cuisine with a line out the door that stretches for miles. After sitting down and trying the food for themselves, however, the crew finds it curiously lacking. When La Coiffe expresses doubts about the restaurant's organic credentials, the owner takes it personally, dragging her and the rest of the crew to a mountain farm to absolve their doubts himself.

(Captain) and company visit an island famous for its produce to restock on provisions.
Finished with most of the purchases for the day, the crew notices a massive line forming near the main road leading back to the ship.
Vyrn: Whoa, take a look at the size of that line!
Lyria: I can't even see where it ends. What's it for?
Villager: You don't know? This is a famous restaurant that uses all-natural organic ingredients to make some of the best food you've ever tasted!
Vyrn: Organic, huh? That sounds right up your alley, scissor girl!
La Coiffe: That's right. Slightly different take on the idea, though.
La Coiffe gazes upward with a nonplussed look on her face. Far away toward the end of the line is the sign for the restaurant, apparently named Microbius.
Lyria: Let's check it out, La Coiffe! It must be good if this many people are waiting in line!
After waiting for a few hours, the crew is finally seated inside. They place their orders, hearts full of anticipation.
Pleasant smells from the kitchen accompany the arrival of an enticing plate of bread and pasta.
Each member of the crew hurriedly reaches across the table, ladles food on their plates, and takes their first bites. An eerie silence follows.
They look quizzically at each other. No one reaches for a second helping.
Vyrn: Hm, I'm not sure what to say. This organic stuff doesn't really do it for me.
Lyria: You're right, Vyrn. It's not really what I expected.
As the crew voices their disappointed reactions to the food in front of them, the owner of the restaurant hurriedly rushes to the table.
Restaurant Owner: Bwahaha! Dearest customers, you merely lack the refined palette necessary to appreciate such fine cuisine!
Restaurant Owner: I'm afraid I must ask you to leave before you besmirch the name of my restaurant any further.
La Coiffe responds calmly to the owner's unreasonable demands.
La Coiffe: If this is how you respond to unsatisfied customers, I kinda doubt your ingredients are even half as all-natural as you claim they are.
Restaurant Owner: How dare you! I have exclusive contracts with organic farms, from which I procure only the finest of all-natural ingredients!
La Coiffe: Oh yeah? How about showing me to the farm, then?
Restaurant Owner: Bwahaha! As you wish. I shall prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that my pride is as pure as mother nature herself!
The crew is led by the owner toward a farm that cultivates all-natural wheat.
Vyrn: Well, this sure got crazy in a hurry.
Lyria: Um, are you sure about this, La Coiffe?
La Coiffe: No worries. Mom and Dad taught me a very important lesson from a young age.
Lyria: What kind of lesson?
La Coiffe: Beauty starts in the kitchen. What starts organic has to end organic.
Vyrn: Hm, I'm not sure I follow, scissor girl. As usual!
Restaurant Owner: Bwahaha! You certainly seem confident, I'll grant you. But you left it up to me to prove my point.
Restaurant Owner: It's far too late to admit your wrongdoing and apologize, you know!
La Coiffe: Quiet. Do you hear that? There's a disturbance within the forest.
Restaurant Owner: A disturbance? Hold on, you! If you're trying to suggest—
La Coiffe: On your guard, everyone! Something's coming.

Simply Organic: Scene 2

La Coiffe visits the farm used by the restaurant for its organic ingredients, but finds several glaring issues with its supposedly all-natural agriculture. La Coiffe then uses her wondrous gardening abilities to purify the farm's produce.

The crew finally arrives at the farm the restaurant owner has an exclusive contract with.
As the elderly couple that runs the farm introduces themselves, they can't help but wax rhapsodic about the ethics motivating their work.
Elderly Man: Yep, better believe it! We don't use any medicine or magic here. Our crops are raised solely by the tender loving care of mother nature!
Restaurant Owner: Bwahaha! So? Still believe the hardworking farmers here to be less than truthful?
La Coiffe: I don't, actually. There are a few things I'd like to have clarified, though.
La Coiffe: First, about the compost you use here—where does it come from?
Elderly Man: Why, we mostly just use leaf mold from the nearby mountains, of course!
Restaurant Owner: You lose again, sweetheart! Everything here from the soil up is completely organic!
La Coiffe: The nearby mountains? As in, the same ones we passed through on the way here?
Elderly Man: Yes, that's right. Why do you ask?
La Coiffe: Have you realized it yet, Mr. Restaurant Owner? We ran into some guests on the way here.
Restaurant Owner: Like who? I certainly didn't notice anyone! Just thoroughly unscrupulous monsters who—
Upon uttering these words, the owner's face turns an unsettling shade of blue.
La Coiffe: It just hit you, didn't it?
La Coiffe: The nearby mountains are infested with monsters, which means the fertilizer you use is tainted with their dark magic!
Restaurant Owner: As if that could possibly have much of an effect on the final product!
La Coiffe: It's not just the compost. The fertilizer's probably got issues, too.
Elderly Woman: There couldn't possibly be any monster influence there. All our fertilizer comes from one of our barns, and gets mixed in with the compost.
Elderly Woman: If you have any doubts, you're free to see for yourself. Follow me, dearie.
La Coiffe: That won't be necessary. The barn must be packed close to bursting with livestock.
La Coiffe: I've been listening to their cries ever since we got here.
Restaurant Owner: Please. You'd hear the same thing at any farm!
La Coiffe: Stressed animals are more likely to become sick. To defend against that, you've probably mixed plenty of medicine into their food.
La Coiffe: All that medicine ends up in the fertilizer, which ends up in the compost. And that means the all-natural produce you've grown is anything but!
La Coiffe: To disguise the contamination, you have to cook it in the blandest way possible. By the time it reaches the table, the only thing that stands out is the stink.
Vyrn: Now I get it! That's why the food we had back at the restaurant was so bad!
Lyria: Wow, La Coiffe! You know so much about nature, beauty, and the fine art of cooking!
With drooping shoulders, the crestfallen restaurant owner mutters an apology to the crew.
Restaurant Owner: Oh, woe is me. Woe is us! All we ever wanted to do was create something wonderful. And here you are, trying to render it all moot.
La Coiffe: Nah. I'm here to make it beautiful.
Restaurant Owner: Huh?
La Coiffe: Hee hee! I knew you guys weren't lying. That's why I'm here.
La Coiffe pulls out a pair of massive scissors and beautifully styles the nearby wheat fields, all while firing off a barrage of hair salon lingo.
Within minutes, the wheat begins to take on its original golden hue, and the entire farm sparkles with a purity that can only be found in nature.
La Coiffe: That should just about do it, Captain! Now let's clean up these monsters!

Simply Organic: Scene 3

After returning to the village, (Captain) and company are invited back to the restaurant, where they're treated to a full course organic dinner using the ingredients La Coiffe purified. With the crew smacking their lips in anticipation of future meals, and La Coiffe giving her full seal of approval, the restaurant owner can once again hold his head high with pride.

(Captain) and company dispatch the monsters in the nearby mountains, allowing the farmers to procure untainted leaf mold once more.
The following day, the owner of the restaurant offers the crew a special invitation as thanks.
What appears at their tables is the same dish from the previous day, but made from the wheat La Coiffe took her scissors to.
Restaurant Owner: Bwahaha! How does it taste? This is the kind of organic cooking my restaurant's known for!
Vyrn: Whoa, the bread and pasta's so much better than the stuff from yesterday, it's crazy!
Lyria: Sure is, Vyrn! Can you believe they used the same wheat, too?
Restaurant Owner: Miss La Coiffe, I would like to offer my sincere apologies for the way I treated you the other day.
Restaurant Owner: I put special care and attention into your dish. Is it... not to your liking?
La Coiffe has yet to take a single bite of the food at the table, making the owner understandably nervous.
With a stern expression, La Coiffe quietly loops a few strands of pasta through her fork, playfully raises it to her mouth, and takes a bite.
La Coiffe: Mm, this is definitely 100% organic! It's so delicious, I can feel myself being purified to the core!
Restaurant Owner: Really? You mean it? Thank goodness. I don't know what I would have done if you didn't like it!
With La Coiffe's seal of approval, the owner of the restaurant can finally rest easy knowing that his food is really, truly organic.

The Scent of Happiness

The crew tracks a gang of thugs down to a nearby village that used to be covered in flowers. La Coiffe and Lennah use their powers to strike fear into the hearts of the thugs and return peace to the town.

Lyria: Wow, (Captain)! Look at all the beautiful flowers!
Vyrn: Sure is pretty here! Hard to believe it's a bad guy hideout...
(Captain) and company get a request to deal with some bandits who have been causing problems for travelers near town.
After arriving at a nearby village where the bandit safe house is rumored to be, the crew can't help but admire the greenery before them.
Lennah: Oh my, isn't this wonderful? Such beautiful flowers as far as the eye can see!
La Coiffe: The all-natural design of this place is simply amaaazing! Just looking at it has me feeling super organic!
Lennah: Oh dear... What flower is this, I wonder? I've never seen it before.
La Coiffe: Hm... It's a variety of carnivorous plant. When it goes dormant, adorable little flowers start to bloom all over!
Lennah: So that's what it is. There certainly are a lot of rare species here.
La Coiffe: Hrmrmrm... Do you know what this little guy is, Lennah? It seems kinda like a tree but different.
Lennah: Hee hee... That's a flower that grows big and lives a long, long time. Looks like it's just about to bloom too.
Vyrn: All this flower talk is fine and all, but can we finish that request we got already?
Lyria: There, there, Vyrn. Let's look around just a little more, and...
Lyria: Huh? Why does this spot have so few flowers?
Lennah: Oh my, you're right. I wonder why?
La Coiffe: Hmm... This didn't happen naturally. Seems like someone wrecked everything here on purpose. The flowers got yanked out too.
Villager: Whoa there, folks. Are you travelers? I'd advise against going much farther if I were you.
Vyrn: Why's that? Something bad past here?
Lyria: Actually... we were given a request to apprehend some bandits.
Villager: You're kidding me. A bunch of kids are going to take out those thugs?
Vyrn: Heheh! Judging us by our appeareance, eh? Well, we're stronger than we look!
Villager: Hrm... Do you really have what it takes to drive them out?
The villager looks around, lets out a sigh, and begins explaining the situation in hushed tones.
After suddenly attacking the town a few days prior, the bandits took over the assembly hall just up ahead.
Villager: We don't have anyone here that can keep the peace. Best we can do is keep the plants watered.
Villager: Sigh... But those bandit jerks said they don't care about the plants. If we don't provide the food and drink they're demanding, they'll burn everything to the ground.
Villager: Worst thing about it is we can't even fight back. Our only choice is to give them what they want.
Villager: It's our fault innocent people are going to suffer. Just thinking about it makes my heart weep...
Lyria: That can't happen! We have to stop them from burning down such a beautiful village!
Vyrn: Got that right! Just let us handle it! We'll beat those bandits and save this town!
Villager: Sorry to impose. Just... be careful. Please.
Vyrn: Look at this place. It's cramped to the max, and there's garbage everywhere!
After travelling down the path, the crew finds a plaza where the bandits have set up shop. What they find there takes their breath away.
Bandit A: Huh? Who the hell are you?
Vyrn: You guys are causing a lot of trouble for everyone! Leave now!
Bandit B: You from the village, lizard? Why should we care what you say?
Bandit C: All those village buttheads know how to do is garden, anyway. We should burn 'em to the ground with the village if you ask me!
Vyrn: I'm not a lizard! And if you're not gonna leave on your own, we'll just have to force you out!
Bandit D: Bwahaha! What's a lizard and a buncha kids like you gonna do to us?
Bandit A: Guess we'll just have to do this the hard way!
Vyrn: Gimme a break! If you want to run, this is your last chance!
(Captain) readies a weapon against the bandits, who approach with weapons of their own.
As they reach striking distance, (Captain)'s grip tightens.
Lennah: Now, now, no need to fight!
Lennah throws herself between the two groups, surprising everyone in sight.
Bandit C: What're you tryin' to pull, girl? Get in our way, and you're gonna get a clobberin'!
Lennah: No wonder you're all so quick to anger. There are no flowers here!
Lennah: Add a few flowers, and I'm sure you'll all be much happier. Then we can all be the best of friends!
Vyrn: Is now really the time, Lennah?
Lennah: Hee hee... You were thinking the same thing, weren't you, La Coiffe?
La Coiffe: That's right. If your environment looks nasty, you'll start to feel nasty too!
La Coiffe: Okay then. We'll just go ahead and treat this sickly garden of yours, free of charge!
Lennah: Hee hee... Let's! We'll make all the flowers and plants here just as happy as can be!
Bandit A: What the! Where'd these flowers come from all of a sudden?
Bandit B: For cryin' out loud! I can't pull 'em off! Urghhh!
Bandit B: What's going on here—
Ack! W-what're you planning to do with those huge scissors?
La Coiffe: Hee hee... So unruly! A good old cut could really do wonders!
Bandit D: Aiee! Stop! You wouldn't dare!
La Coiffe: Snip, snip! Hee hee... It's going to be all right, dear. You're all going to feel absolutely fabulous when we're done!
Bandits: Aaaagh! Stop! Please!
The bandits are engulfed in flowers conjured up out of nowhere. The scissor blades La Coiffe weilds dance around the troublemakers.
It doesn't take long for La Coiffe and Lennah to finish their beautifying.
Lennah: Hee hee. All done! Say hello to your beautiful new garden packed with happiness!
Lyria: Oh my gosh... It's incredible! Everything was a mess just a few moments ago!
La Coiffe: What do you think? I don't exactly get to work with magical flowers like Lennah's every day, so I decided to try for something airy and open.
La Coiffe: Hee hee. It really makes the flowers pop seeing them next to the trees and other plantlife.
Vyrn: Hey, you're right. Considering how many trees there are, the flowers really stand out!
Vyrn: Wait! The bandits! What's going on with the bandits?
Lennah: No worries! Look at them. They have such contented looks on their faces!
Lennah: Oh, it's simply wonderful! Feeling relaxed in this wonderful, happy flower garden?
Bandits A & B: Aah! Have mercy! We've had enough flowers to last a lifetime!
La Coiffe: Hee hee. Your clothes are looking super organic too! A perfect match for the flowers!
Bandits C & D: Oh no... The clippers... They're coming this way!
Bandits: We're so sorry! We'll never show our faces in this village again!
Lyria: Wow! They all ran off!
Vyrn: We did it! Nice work you two!
Villager: Hey, everyone! The bandits just came running past, and—wow! What a beautiful garden!
Villager: I don't believe it! You didn't just get rid of those bandits; you fixed up the garden too!
Villager: Thank you so much! Our village is in your debt!
La Coiffe: Hee hee! Hooray! All our hard work paid off, Lennah!
Lennah: Tee hee... It certainly did. It seems these flowers are going to make a lot of people very happy!
Thanks to a little flower power, La Coiffe and Lennah end the crisis without conflict.
The two share a day of satisfied smiles with the rest of the village, buoyed by the fragrant scent of flowers all around them.

Side-scrolling Quotes

JapaneseThis is an official transcription. EnglishThis is an official translation.